with everything that has been going on for the week or so--school/work/family/money/god--i've fallen a little behind with my progress in classes. french especially, but also russian and women's studies, and i'm scrambling to get it all together so i can pull out with mostly A's and hopefully no more than two B's. otherwise, i lose my merit scholarship and i will be screwed--very, very Screwed.
also, portland just got its first snowfall last night, and i missed french this morning because i was waiting my turn at les schwab, hoping they would fix my flat tire before class started (they couldn't do either--by the time class was nearly over, they let me know my tire was not fixable, and i had to buy a new one). sigh. plus, most classes are canceled tomorrow and through the end of the week--which should be a relief, but it scares me because i won't have much time to meet with teachers and figure out a week to finish strong.
but, i guess i'll just have to suck it up. if i end up with a list of bad grades and lose the scholarship, i guess that's that. i'll pay for the lost $500 per term with loans, and i will move on. college is not the rest of my life. eventually, these things won't matter anymore.
anyway, i think i'm doing better. everything still seems upside-down and i feel like i'm swimming through my life. maybe not even swimming--more like fighting the current that seems to be taking me everything i don't want to go. but i can't dwell on this. i need to chin up and move forward.
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